To lose yourself in dance is to find yourself within

As a 15 year old who has been dancing for almost 8 years now, I have grown up surrounded by the influence of dance. I have often pondered upon why I dance. What is it about it that leaves me wanting to go back to class each week with the excitement of learning something new? Dancing has not only taught me a lot about Odissi and the history and culture of India, but also helped me grow as a person and develop certain skills that I would not have otherwise.

When I entered my teenage years, I had just begun to grow up. I did not know who I was and was in the process of finding myself. Dancing helped me reflect on what my character was and what I liked and disliked. Every piece taught me a little more about myself and let me connect with a different part of my soul. It showed me my strengths and weakness and enabled me to work on my flaws. However, most importantly, dance taught me to embrace myself the way I am and love every part of myself no matter what. Dance to me, is just another way of expressing my emotions. I have used dance to express myself during some of the most happy as well the most sad and difficult times of my life. As a teenager, I have gone through my own set of problems that all of us go through at this point in our lives. Over two years, I was body shamed to a point where it broke me, I lost many friends who I considered to be dear and was academically at a point where I was starting to think about what I wanted to do and become in the future. Dancing helped me forget my problems (which seemed extremely big at the time) as I immersed myself in it. Every time I felt burdened or stressed, I would lose myself in dance and eventually found solutions to these problems through this. It also helped me express my feelings.

I started dancing at the age of 6 and as a young child, I was always surrounded by peers who made fun of me for learning an Indian classical dance form. Right from when I was little to even now, I never had a slim body. I also have pes planus (flat feet) which makes it much harder for me to dance. However, I was passionate about dance which negated everything else. Dancing despite all of this has taught me about persistence and hard work. It has taught me to push my limits. I practiced hard at something that didn’t come naturally to me and backed by my mother’s support and teacher’s guidance, I honed my skills. Doing group performances has taught me a lot about teamwork and adjustment. While practicing for group performances, we all have to at some point, adjust our schedules and often opinions to make it happen. As a student, the most important skill that dance has taught me is time management. I have often juggled school assignments, exams and dance performances all at the same time under the pressure of having to do justice to all of them. I once went to perform at the Delhi Odissi Utsav in the middle of my final exams! Dancing has also taught me how to be disciplined. Being a dancer, one needs to not only be disciplined in terms of one’s behavior, but also in our lifestyles. I ensure I eat healthy, exercise and practice regularly to improve my stamina. Dancing has helped improve my concentration, mental health and I have made friends in class that are for life.

However, the one most important thing I have learnt through dance is that if you’re passionate about something, absolutely nothing can stop you from achieving it. I have loved dance throughout my life, and today, after having learnt for nearly 8 years, I can truly say that I have found something that I can run to when I’m happy and sad, something that will always be with me no matter what. It has not only helped me develop a very unique skill that I am incredibly proud and happy to have, but also given me memories that I will never forget. The memory of dressing up to dance for the first time, or those of my first out station performance are moments that I will always cherish. I have made life long relationships with my gurus and friends in class over such a small but significant part of our lives- dance.

                                                                                                                                                                                                              -Janavi Gupta